u/Subject_Anywhere_742

My wife and I have been married 12 years and our marriage evolved into a FLR one naturally over time. At the start of our relationship I played the unnatural role of a sexual dominant. When we were very much in love and secure I confided to her that I desired submission. She around the same time came to understand that despite what society expected she was a dominant.

Our sexual D/s dynamic soon translated to all other aspects of our life. It was like an exhale for me — to give power in the relationship to her. I have admired her as frankly my superior from the start. She is smarter than me and vastly more emotionally intelligent. I trust her completely in the financial and life decisions she makes. She treats me kindly and always considers my views, but she is the decision maker in our relationship. I have ceded all major decision making to her and my role is very much one of service and support.

Our sex life does include cuckolding and chastity. That said, she never humiliates me. These are just wonderful symbols of my love for her, support, and placing her needs first. That is what brings me true happiness. It always has.

Now to the unexpected after years of happy FLR. Throughout our marriage, I have been the provider. Despite my submission at home, I’m an a very successful business man and very aggressive at work. I commanded an objectively high salary. My wife does however control the finances. I am irresponsible with money and I am much better hands with her as the decision maker.

Recently, though, my wife received a job offer that was incredible. She instantly started off making more than me and that has only increased. She is now a very high ranking executive at her company, much higher than I could ever hope for.

For the first time in our marriage I feel insecurity. Like I may have lost the last vestige of traditional masculinity. Cuckolding now feels different than before because I feel insecure. As does the many other emasculating acts she performs on me and that I do for her.

I am not proud of this. I had thought of myself as a more enlightened man that had cast off traditional gender roles in embracing a FLR. But, I can’t control the emotions this triggered.

My wife and I are currently actively discussing this and my emotions. She is incredibly supportive.

I am just posting for perspectives and experience around d this. Thanks!! No

Long story short: I kinda like light SPH. I don’t tell my wife this directly. But I’ve done things like ask her to tell me how big her exes were or how I compare. She plays along but I don’t push this. I am actually insecure because all but one was bigger than me, some a lot.

She has always told me that don’t worry even though may were bigger mine is great / her favorite ever and average.

Last week I got up the courage to ask her to do something that I fantasized about for a long time — I asked her to measure me with a tailor’s tape.

When she saw it it was obviously less than she expected. She said immediately “oh wow it’s less than 6, I always figured you were six”. I asked her why she thought that and she said because she thinks that’s average and she figured I was average. This does not sound socking or anything but the look on her face I’ll always remeber. It was like a surprised stepping back “this is interesting ..” with a little smile. Not like mean or anything but it clearly had some impact on her.

I explained to her that actually 6 is above average. 5-5.5 is average. She said well maybe that statistic is worldwide and maybe it’s different just in our area. She was very reassuring though. She said I am overthinking it. That i already know I’m the second smallest she had yet …. She picks me! And how this is silly because this is a non issue and no woman picks a man for his penis.

Still ,,, this kinda shook me. That look on her face. I kinda regret not that my fantasy might have had a real impact on how my wife thinks of me as a man. I wish I had not asked her to do this. Just a cautionary tale I guess for guys that are thinking of asking their wife or gf to do this. Or it’s all in my head.