u/_Godzirra

New to the scene?

We see a lot of new faces lately, which is honestly great to see.

But with that also comes nerves, questions, and sometimes the wrong expectations.

So here’s a simple, real breakdown for anyone thinking about coming along to a venue for the first time.

First things first… feeling nervous is normal

If you’re feeling anxious, unsure, or even a bit intimidated… you’re not alone.

Everyone you see there had a “first time” where they didn’t know what to expect either.

You are not expected to know everything. You are not expected to do anything.

Just showing up is enough.

You don’t have to do anything

This is probably the biggest misconception.

You can:

• Come just to look

• Come just to socialise

• Stay fully clothed the whole time

• Leave early

There is zero pressure to play, interact, or engage beyond what you’re comfortable with.

Anyone who makes you feel otherwise is doing it wrong.

Consent is everything

This space only works because of respect.

• No always means no

• Silence is not a yes

• “Maybe later” is still a no

And just as important…

You are allowed to say no at any point, even if something has already started.

No explanations required.

Communication matters more than confidence

You don’t need to be smooth, experienced, or “good at this”.

You just need to be clear and respectful.

Simple things go a long way:

• “Hey, would you be open to chatting?”

• “Is it okay if I join?”

• “All good if not”

That last part is important. People feel it.

Hygiene and awareness

This should go without saying, but it matters.

• Shower before attending

• Be mindful of shared spaces

• Clean up after yourself

• Respect that others are using the same environment

It’s not just about you, it’s about everyone there.

You will probably miss opportunities… and that’s okay

This happens to everyone.

You’ll see someone you were interested in, hesitate, and then they’re gone.

Don’t beat yourself up over it. It’s part of the experience.

There’s always another night.

The right people make it feel easy

If something feels pressured, awkward, or off… trust that feeling.

The right interactions feel natural, mutual, and comfortable.

You’re not there to impress anyone. You’re there to enjoy yourself.

Final note

This is a space built on respect, curiosity, and connection.

If you bring those three things, you’ll be more than fine.

If you’re unsure about anything, feel free to ask here.

Curious to hear…

What was your first experience like? Or what’s something you wish you knew before going?