Thoughts on a past friendship
Helloo. Last November I cut off (blocked/ghosted) someone I spent the whole year with in 2025. We spent a lot of time together but frequently bumped heads as we sort of wanted two different things from the connection, on top of the fact that we weren’t always nice to each other nor did we really communicate or listen to each other well. Things went misunderstood, boundaries were crossed and some unhealed wounds from our past opened in the process. I knew I had complicated feelings for them (both platonic and romantic) that I couldn’t quite reconcile with and they were just very nonchalant about certain things and at times combative, dismissive and guarded. We had fun times together, but overall it felt very much like a codependent situation since we were both very lonely after coming back from some respective situations.
Anyway, it’s only been 4 months but I still think about them often and I continue to feel the need to reach out and apologize for the ghosting, any wrongdoing I might’ve done and maybe give our friendship another shot, or at the very least clear the air, but… I’m not healed from that situation at all. I continue to replay things I tolerated/allowed and things I said and did that felt completely out of character for me (almost like an out of body experience)
Wondering if it’s worth reaching out, or if I should just give myself more time.